There is something delicious about opening the front door after a long day of work, especially when it’s not a rush-in-rush-out again evening. Sometimes it’s the lure of the sofa and the ability to curl up and lose myself in some inane television programme which requires no thought on my part whatsoever. Sometimes it’s the chance to make something very yummy for tea, the thought of which has generally occupied my mind for most of the day.

Sometimes it’s the prospect of exciting mail. Last Christmas two friends bought me subscriptions to two different magazines – it’s always an exciting day when they drop on the doormat. So there is always something to look forward to in between the bills and other dull grown up stuff.

Today however my only post was a letter from ‘Cats Protection’ with the following message on the envelope:

‘These mailings are designed as economically as possible. This one cost less than 18p to produce and is being sent only to people who we believe may care for the safety and well-being of cats’.

Now, it’s not that I don’t want cats to be safe or to ‘be well’. It’s just that these people mistakenly think that I actually care. I have a hate-hate relationship with cats. I have never met one I have liked or one that has liked me. Perhaps that’s where the problem lies. Or maybe my issue is more with the cats in my local neighbourhood that confuse my excuse for a garden as their litter tray… grrrr…

That’s not to say I lack complete compassion. When friends had moved to a smaller abode and talked about how ‘there wasn’t enough room to swing a cat’ in their new living room I was momentarily horrified at the thought of them testing out its spaciousness by actually swinging their cat. Thankfully I realised just in time they were speaking metaphorically.

But I am sorry that Cats Protection has spent their 18 pence on me and haven’t directed their fundraising to a more worthy and caring individual. I will however open their letter – looks like there’s a free pen inside!